I only got two games wrong last week, picking 11 correctly, my best effort so far. I'm definitely gonna drop my total score by one this time, because I can't pick <enter team name here> to beat the Dolphins...they're on their bye week.

 

49ers over Falcons: Atlanta is a mess right now, even in their locker room
Bengals over Bills: Cincy's defense should be learning from their mistakes by now
Broncos over Lions: After a painful MNF loss, they're gonna be fired up
Titans over Panthers: Young totally sucked last week, and they still won...he won't suck two weeks in a row
Packers over Chiefs: Riding an emotional high
Chargers over Vikings: Let them call Jeff George back, who the heck is going to care...
Jaguars over Saints: Jacksonville has the better record, but NO has really poured it on the last few weeks...so this is my upset pick
Redskins over Jets: Boy, are these guys pissed...a lot of that frustration is going to be taken out on the hapless Jets
Bucs over Cardinals: Same story every year for Arizona: they look great on paper, they look good for the first few games, then half-way thru the season...bleh
Seahawks over Browns: Rested from a bye week...but still the underdog?
Patriots over Colts: The "battle of the unbeatens" game...Indy is going to get smoked, just like every other team
Cowboys over Eagles: Lots of boos will greet T.O., but he's going to have the same impact as he did last year: little to none. Still, the 'boys have way too many other weapons
Steelers over Ravens: What the heck went wrong with Baltimore's defense this year?

...just as I had hoped in my Week 8 predictions, Favre gave us one for the history books. What a finish. Let's recap, shall we?

 

Wow, it's been awhile since I participated in Letterman's Top 10 List contest. This week's contest looked kinda fun, so I submitted the following:

 

Top Ten Signs The White House Is Haunted

The Patriots-Colts hype has officially kicked into gear. And it appears that Sports Illustrated has visually predicted the winner...

Picked 10 correctly last week. Only 13 games this week, so it's my best shot at winning that TV.

 

Lions over Bears: picking Detroit, of course, means the Bears will win
Steelers over Bengals: Cincy is still looking for a defense...oh look, here comes one from Pittsburgh!
Titans over Raiders: Young should be healthy, right? And has anybody heard anything about Oakland's first pick?
Rams over Browns: St Louis has to win someday, and losing to the Browns would be so ego-deflating
Giants over Dolphins: Miami has to win someday...next year...and they're jettisoning their ego-inflated players
Eagles over Vikings: Philly is slightly healthier
Colts over Panthers: Vinny was a wonderful story two weeks ago...this week, Manning's gonna make him look like a dinosaur
Bills over Jets: I don't think I've picked Buffalo yet this season, and the Jets have repeatedly let me down
Chargers over Texans: OK, so who ISN'T rooting for them this week...?
Bucs over Jaguars: The team with the experienced QB should win
Patriots over Redskins: Probably the toughest team they've met this season...until next week, that is
Saints over 49ers: I hope I'm not forced to watch this game
Packers over Broncos: Favre's (supposedly) final MNF game...I expect something to happen

The last-minute dash to find a Halloween costume is upon you! Not sure what to get? Why not consider any of these Japanese Halloween costumes? You'll be the most talked-about person at the party! Trust me, that level of notoriety is guaranteed! Note: anal-retentive people won't consider this to be work-safe...

Sent a Letter to the Editor at the Seattle Times. They did a considerable amount of editing, but the message is still there.

Using the "Woody Picks" actually worked! I increased my correctly picked winners from seven to...eight. It was worth a shot, anyway. This week, I'm going back to thinking...

 

Ravens over Bills: It's a gimme-game for Baltimore
Bucs over Lions: Almost every time I bet against TB, they win. Almost every time I pick the Lions, they lose.
Patriots over Dolphins: I'd love to pick Miami as the upset of the week. Yes, I'm being sarcastic.
Saints over Falcons: NO seems to have finally put the pieces together.
Giants over 49ers: Eli ain't great, but he's good enough.
Redskins over Cardinals: Arizona is on their third QB, now that they lost Leinart and Warner.
Titans over Texans: Young has never missed a game in his life...and this is HOUSTON, you know he wants to tear them up again.
Bengals over Jets: Both huge disappointments, I'm going with home field on this one.
Chiefs over Raiders: I think the Chiefs simply want it more.
Cowboys over Vikings: Time to start beating up on lesser teams again, guys. Not worth the price of popcorn, tho'
Eagles over Bears: Going with home field again, and besides, I just want to see the Bears lose again.
Seahawks over Rams: Bulger's back, but he's still got hurt ribs.
Steelers over Broncos: Three critical components are coming off the injury list for this game, Denver is probably gonna get pummeled.
Colts over Jags: Finally, a Monday night game featuring two winning teams...but the Jags are seriously overmatched here.

Google knows, and they know which countries search which keywords the most.

 

"Sex" is still big in Egypt, India and Turkey.

"Hitler" is popular in Germany, Mexico and Austria, while "Nazi" is the most popular in Chile, Australia and the UK.

"Jihad" pings up in Morocco, Indonesia and Pakistan.

"Terrorism" is most searched in Pakistan, Philippines and Australia.

 

And which keyword does the United States call their "Big #1"...?

 

 

Makes sense, when ya think about it...

I'll bet every comedy talk show host is going to have some sort of joke for this one tonight: Barack Obama is related to BOTH Bush and Cheney. He and Cheney share an ancestor from eight generations ago, and he's an 11th cousin to Bush.

 

When Obama's spokesman found out about the family tie to Cheney, he joked, "Obviously, Dick Cheney is sort of the black sheep of the family."

Many people would say yes. At least, death is what this guy was sentenced to today, because he kidnapped a woman and her 5-year-old daughter, dropped the little girl into the water in the Everglades known as "Alligator Alley" and drove away. Imagining what that child was thinking and experiencing, all alone, when she was attacked makes me want to cry.

 

I don't have a problem with the death sentence. In fact, when it was brought up in state voting to bring death sentences back, I was just 18...and voted in favor of it. However, there are certain situations and crimes where I do not believe it should be used.

 

This is one of those situations. This guy should be in General Population, not a cozy, safe, death-row cell awaiting a tiny needle prick after decades of appeals and millions of tax dollars. Because in General Population, he knows he's going to die a horrific death...but he won't know when, where, how or by whom.

 

That would be similar fear which the little girl felt. That would be justice served.

 

This guy got off easy.

A 13-year-old kid was shot twice by a Seattle police officer early today. The cop thought the kid and his 14-year-old buddy were acting suspiciously, had to chase them down in his cruiser, and ordered them to put their hands up. The kid who got shot decides to ignore the officer's orders, starts coming toward the officer, lifts his t-shirt, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a cell phone. The officer naturally assumed a weapon of some kind was coming out of the pocket, and pulled the trigger.

 

According to the deputy chief of operations for the Seattle police, the little brat's parents are "understandably angry about the situation". But the article doesn't specify what PART of the situation they are angry about.

 

Because I'll tell you what...if I catch my 13-year-old son out tagging at THREE O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING, and he then starts acting insolent and defiant toward me, he's going to WISH a cop with bad aim found him first.

First he lost millions of fans when it became apparent he was into dog fighting. Then he lost millions of dollars in endorsements. Then he lost his friends, who turned on him. Then he lost his team, and potentially his career. Then he got sued for 63 billion (with a great big "B") for stealing pitbulls, and selling them on eBay to finance the purchase of missiles from Iran (ok, you knew somebody just had to do it, right?). Then he lost the few supporters still willing to stand up for him thru this crysis. Then he got sued for millions of dollars for defaulting on a real estate venture loan. Then he got sued for millions of dollars for a car rental venture. Then he lost 20 million of his signing bonus, to be returned to the Falcons (tho' this is not guaranteed, and in fact is unlikely to happen after appeal). Then there is a Texas Tech jerk trying to make money off him with tasteless t-shirts depicting him dangling the Aggies' mascot by the leash.

 

What more could possibly go wrong for Mike Vick?

 

Well, how about your old high school finally giving up you, too...and pulling your jersey from their trophy case.

 

Such a sad life. I suppose the only person who still loves him unconditionally is his dog.

 

OK, hold on now, don't you go startin' to slam me for that one, he damn well deserves it, you know it, shut the F up...

This week, I've decided to go with "Woody Picks". In other words, I'm primarily picking the winners and losers based on how cool their helmets look. Or how uncool...whatever. Results can't be any worse than if I thought thru the process, right?

 

Vikings over Bears: C is for Cookie.
Browns over Dolphins: Plain orange is better than Flipper jumping thru a hoop.
Redskins over Packers: G is for Gookie...ok, that was bad...
Bengals over Chiefs: Tiger stripes are always cool.
Eagles over Jets: Your team name on a helmet, with no cool-looking logo? Bleh.
Titans over Bucs: The Jolly Roger was never meant to be on a RED flag. Heck, they shouldn't have even used a flag at all. Titans logo has blue flames...way cool.
Jaguars over Texans: A mean-ass looking jungle cat, or a cow's head painted red, white and blue...which would you want for your helmet?
Ravens over Rams: One has a bird that looks pissed off, the other looks like it wears overnight curlers for that bouncy look in the morning
Panthers over Cardinals: A big black cat eats a little red bird, film at 11.
Patriots over Cowboys: Someone needs to dance on the star this game.
Raiders over Chargers: It's not just the helmet logo, it's the colors, too.
Seahawks over Saints: Looks like something you wear on a necklace.
Giants over Falcons: Actually, the Falcons have the cooler looking helmet, but I just...can't...pick...them...to win. Sorry.

I know, old news. But here's more proof:

 

Just to illustrate, years ago my uncle was appointed ambassador to a hotspot country by this idiot's father, and when the major news story broke about the "loose nukes" of nuclear materials stolen from the then-defunct Soviet Union and smuggled to Germany for sale, I asked my uncle about it. He had two things to say: the events happened many years earlier, and...he couldn't talk about it. Then he said that most of the major threats against the US or humanity have never been heard about.

 

That's the way it's supposed to work. They aren't working just to keep the world spinning, they're working to keep the world spinning later, too. And as was once famously said, loose lips sink ships.

 

Fast-forward to present day: we recently got a new video message from Osama bin Laden! He's not dead! Huge story! Problem is, we weren't supposed to find out until the official release date of his video. But our beloved Bush Administration, in all their self-congratulatory wizdom and desire to upstage a routine colonoscopy, immediately leaked it to the world...and destroyed years worth of building a surveillance operation that was intercepting secret al-Qaeda communications.

 

Great job on the War on Terror, Junior! Hey, here's a great idea...just give them our entire playbook for how we intend to fight this so-called war so that we're all on a level playing field, m'kay? It would be the fair thing to do!

 

Hard to believe this idiot's father was once Director of the CIA, isn't it? You'd think he'd call home once in while for some fatherly advice, dontcha?

Not me...Peter King. In today's Monday Morning Quarterback he said, "e. I almost feel sorry for A-Rod. Almost." In other words, after not showing up for games 1 & 2, then being a non-factor in game 3, nobody is referring to A-Rod as Mr. October...still. YaY! I wonder if anyone has started documenting The Curse of the A-Rod yet...after all, the Red Sox originally tried to court A-Rod out of Texas (twice) when the Yankees suddenly jumped on him. Sounds like a payback superstition setup that worked wonderfully, if you ask me...make The Boss pay thru the nose, then reverse-sweep the Yankees on the way to the World Series, then hope it works again before A-Rod can opt out of his contract...

 

As an aside, King went on to say, "f. Can you imagine Joe Torre, 20 years from now, pulling a couple of grandchildren on his lap and saying, "Buffy, Jody, let me tell you the story of how Gramp got fired one time -- and it had something to do with a swarm of tiny insects.'' " However, 20 years from now his grandchildren will have already graduated college and approaching the age of 30...I doubt the brittle-boned legs of an 83-year-old man will support them very well...

I sure ain't gonna WIN one predicting NFL games. Assuming the Cowboys win tonight (another all-but-a-given MNF game), I picked another dismal 7 out of 14. I recall doing a LOT better last year. The Ravens, Bears and Panthers barely squeeked out of town with wins. And the Lions, Seahawks and Broncos all got completely 0wn3d this weekend, scoring a combined total of just six points. Yeeowwwch.

Some teams will bounce back from last week, others will continue their roll, and home teams will primarily rule...tho' my predictions sucked last week, so what the hell do I know...

 

Titans over Falcons: Atlanta might think they just need to attack Young like they would attack Vick during practice...but unlike Vick, Young can beat you with his arm.
Chiefs over Jaguars: Hard choice, but the Chiefs finally seem to be doing things better
Cardinals over Rams: Any other season, I'd pick the Rams. But their offense is lost, and their defense has to prepare for two different QBs instead of just one.
Patriots over Browns: NE has had SUCH an easy schedule so far...
Saints over Panthers: Delhomme is likely still out, and the Saints really need to bounce back.
Giants over Jets: It's not like I can pick the Home Team this time :-)
Seahawks over Steelers: Some would say this is my upset of the week. But the Steelers demonstrated how to be beaten last week, and the Seahawks defense has finally figured out how to kick ass.
Lions over Redskins: Just a hunch...Detroit now knows how to rack up points really, really quick.
Texans over Dolphins: Bounce-back time, home field, and Miami really suxors
Colts over Bucs: If any team is going to beat TB, it's these guys...
Broncos over Chargers: Upset game of the week. Will San Diego's poor excuse for a head coach be able to breathe at Mile High?
49ers over Ravens: Bounce-back, home field, and Baltimore has been decimated on both sides of the line.
Packers over Bears: GB has a QB that is kicking ass without a running game. Chicago has two QBs who couldn't kick a mule in unison.
Cowboys over Bills: Buffalo was somewhat surprising last week, but Dallas is too good.

Perhaps. Back in the days when Quake 2 was released, I was one of the first in the Seattle area to buy a copy (the boxes were still in the FedEx truck outside Egghead Software when I arrived at 9 AM). Boot Magazine (now Maximum PC) had what I believe was the first public Quake 2 server. I joined their frag-fest before I finished the second level, and never finished the game...I was hooked on online fragging with this game for literally two years.

 

Unlike others, I was strictly keyboard...no mouse. I was a "straight-shooter", so to speak, never looking up or down. But I regularly hit the frag limit...or finished in the top 3 on every level. This went on for months, and I was visiting numerous different servers to find new custom levels and new people to kill.

 

Then all of a sudden, I started getting my ass kicked. Constantly. I figured it was my 33.6 modem, so when @Home came to Seattle, I immediately signed up for broadband goodness. But wait...I was still getting my assed kicked! Super-low ping rates affected me NOT! I then realized some servers hosted players who were obviously cheating...others, not so obvious...and tried to avoid those servers. I also always downloaded the latest game patches that would help prevent cheating, but that didn't help much either.

 

What did I do? I became proficient using a mouse. I was seriously kicking some ass...but STILL not coming close to the frag limits anymore. For the most part, I gave up on online gaming...I just wasn't nearly good enough to compete.

 

Then I read this article about online game cheating. Now I wonder if I really degraded in my abilities as much as I thought...

She lost custody of her kids. Me, I couldn't pick NFL winners if I swung a large stick. Assuming the Patriots win tonight (which is all but a given), I only got 7 out of 14. Lots of upsets: after McNabb achieved a perfect passer rating of 153.8 last week, everybody (except me) thought the Giants would lose, but McNabb couldn't stay off his back. As I pointed out last week about Warner giving the Cards a chance against the Steelers if he were to start...I had no idea a two-QB approach would be used, so another upset there. The Bears dumped Bad Rex and had the game in the bag, until they let the Lions score 34 frickin' points in the 4th quarter. The Jets always seem to lose when you least expect them to. Peter King ranks the pitiful 1-3 Chargers at #10, stating "They're too good"...to which I say what Bill Parcells always says: "You are what your record says you are", and the Chargers record screams, "Our coach sucks!" If your coach sucks, your team won't win. The Seahawks win wasn't an upset, per se, although many predicted the 49ers would win...if not for the sack-happy defense that completely smothered those guys. It was toward the end of the first half before the 49ers converted their first first-down, and even tho' the 'hawks always took possession with good-to-fantastic field position, they couldn't take advantage of their good fortune with serious points...but a win is a win, especially against a division rival that 0wn3d us last year.